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Showing posts from October, 2015

Fighting for My Good Barbara

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We often say on the golf course that we have brought the wrong person along to play our golf game. Bad Golfer Barbara generally comes with me. However, I know that somewhere inside this body that is mine is a really good game of golf waiting to happen. Good Golfer Barbara will
score yet.

Even when I am on Facebook, I have to fight to keep Bad Barbara at bay. She can really be snarky and mean. I am sorry that she even exists but there you have it.

For example, today I found a post with the question that asked, "What do you think of the 'man bun'?". That would be a man with a bun on the back of his head to bring his long hair under control. Bad Barbara really wanted to say, "I don't care. I am too busy thinking about world peace."

I wish that people would use "I" at the beginning of sentence and "you or me" at the end, i.e. "Jenny and I went shopping." or "It was really too much for Jenny and me." See what I mean. I…

Embracing the Season

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I walked yesterday. The leaves are yellow and when the sun shines, the earth almost glows. It has been raining and the sky is vibrant blue. As I breathed the air deeply taking in the smell of growing things, I could only think how much I love this season.

In fact, I often see myself as in the fall of my life. Like the days of that season, it is a golden place. Things don't spring to life as much anymore and my hair is gloriously white. But when I breath deeply, I feel alive and can almost feel the growth. I think and learn more deeply. I am full of books and wisdom. The simple truth is I embrace this season with simple joy.

Have a wonderful day.

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Time: It's All Relative!

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I read many years ago that a child's perception of time was based on how big they were. When my grandchildren walk beside me, because my stride is bigger than theirs, I will arrive at the corner sooner than they will. So it is with time.

The distance also appears further to them. When I look down the block to the corner, I am not overcome by how far it is. But for them that block looks like a mile.

As you can see time is on my mind today. It is going so fast that I cannot remember if I just changed the sheets or if that was last week. My thinking is always, "How could it be a week already?"

I suppose that has something to do with aging. Our time is short so it seems unfair that it is going faster than we care to admit.


In an article written by Belle Beth Cooper  she pointed out that "the funny thing is, by focusing on what you were doing, you actually slowed down time (or how your brain perceived that time, anyway)." The actual time that passed is always the s…

Have I Been Telling the Truth About Retirement?

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I was thinking the other day about what how to describe retirement to my children. I know...they have seen it in action for almost 20 years so why would that be necessary? The thing is we may have not been letting them see what "really" goes on in our life. We don't want to be a burden or moan and groan  (oops). We may put on a good face for them. You know, just for show.

It is hard for me to be totally honest about our life because I write a blog that talks about the positive side of life and that is the way my mind works. The truth of the matter is, I just don't think about the negative part a whole lot. It does not seem necessary.

So here goes some truths about retirement and aging that you will not hear from me very often:

You will get bored...really you will. If you're smart and active it won't happen very often but if you can figure out a way to avoid it let me know. Mind numbing boredom will happen!You will fight with your spouse. Spending 24/7 together…

How Do YOU Feel About Aging?

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Thoughts on How to Change How You Feel About Aging from an article in the Wall Street Journal By ANNE TERGESEN October 19, 2015 The link to this article was found in a Twit by Ali Davies (@ali_davies)
All those years ago when our country experienced a financial downturn, many people's dreams of retirement went up in smoke. The hopeful retiree began to see aging in a different light. Growing old without a chance to do all those things they dreamed of was depressing. I think their damaged vision of that stage in life may have been a self-fulling prophecy.
It was during that period that I read an article somewhere about how our money was going to go further as we aged. If we played our cards right in some way, things were not going to be as awful as the news predicted. Sometimes I wonder if anyone besides me read that piece. There was so much gloom and doom from every retirement adviser that the likelihood of growing old beautifully could not be seen. 
I think that in the end what w…

Getting "Real" With My Followers about Retirement

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As I write more and more I find that the comments I receive are more relevant to what I have written and in many cases heart wrenching. When people let me see into their lives, I realize that like me, they are searching for answers. They are hoping that maybe I have them.
Today a person commented from somewhere in Canada about retiring soon. They are from Korea and have accumulated enough wealth to quit work and move to the "location of their dreams" (my words not theirs.) Should they go back to a place where the language is their own or should they take a chance and choose somewhere outside their comfort zone. Those of us that are retired understand those questions entirely.

So what do you think? Do you jump ship and move to the far reaches of the earth to find a new life or do you just change the scenery but not the culture? Hmmmmm!

Someone asked me many years ago if I would move to Spain. My husband and I had just returned from a extended stay in the country. I fell in lo…

Just When I Thought NO ONE Was Watching!

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You know how it is. You don't put on your underwear and go out in public thinking that no one will notice. On that day you meet your high school principal, your doctor, the minister at your church and every neighbor you have ever lived next to....and they are noticing. Not that they say it out loud but you can tell...they all know that you are barenaked underneath your clothes.

I will have to admit that I feel that way about Facebook, Twitter and my blog here on Retire In Style Blog. I think I can get away with just about anything because I am sure no one is watching. Then, just when I think no one was watching, everyone is. I don't know if that good. I suppose it all depends.

Last week I posted a picture I had seen on my news feed.


For some very strange reason people I knew that I thought never saw anything I posted "liked" that post. There were 30 of my friends to be exact. It is ok...really it is. Just incase any of you are wondering, I am just fine. I am not seni…

How Do You See the Future You?

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We dropped in to have a cup of coffee with my daughter and her husband this morning. They had been to a Weight Watchers meeting so of course the conversation turned to what was going on there. My son-in-law told me that the question for the morning was "How do you see your future self?" He said he saw himself as Tom Selleck. I am not sure if that dates him or not but I guess even the old Tom is not bad!

Then he looked at me expectantly. I am almost 74 years old so seeing the future me means something entirely different. I am living my future. The outcome was determined many, many years ago. I am the answer to the how the future will look, not the question.

I suppose the two things that I thought about when I was younger was money and health if I indeed thought about anything. I was never the primary breadwinner although I did work most of my life. I am a retired teacher. I always saw my role as keeping things under control so we could live on what we had not what we wanted t…

Guns and Mental Illness: The View From My Front Porch

I play a learning game with myself occasionally. When I feel very strongly about something, I need to be reminded that the strength of my opinion is usually inversely proportionate to the depth of my knowledge... the less I know the louder I talk. So to tone myself down I write down what I think I know and then research to see if I am even close. Here is one I wrote after the incident in Roseburg, Oregon a couple of weeks ago. 
Note: The best statistics are available on Mother Jone website. Read the information and see what you think.

See this article about Patrick Kennedy's take on mental illness and the Roseburg killings.

From 1900 until 1958 there were four mass murders here in the United States. In fact, in my youth I did not even know that sort of thing could ever happen. But as the years passed, I saw President Kennedy, Bobby Kennedy and Martin Luther King assassinated. It was a string of beads that added up to mass murder in my mind. By the time my oldest was graduating from…

On the Lost and Found Department

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I have been in the business of lost and found since I was a very young child. School work, watches and items of clothing seemed to vanish and reappear without explanation. Nothing has changed. I still continually lose things.

The really spooky thing about it is I do not worry that I will never get it back. Well, not usually. I will have to admit that misplacing my camera last week did get my attention. I asked for help and searched high and low only to find it, not in my own house, but in my daughters. No, it didn't fly across the street and up two blocks. I actually left it there. That adventure spurred a series of Facebook messages that had everyone laughing. It looked like this:
KOBummer. Hope you find it. Like · Reply · October 2 at 3:34pm