Jan 30, 2011

Golfing in Arizona and the Movies

Cover of "The Bells of St. Mary's"Cover of The Bells of St. Mary'sGolfing and Arizona love each other.  But did you know that the movies hold a big place in Arizona's heart too?   For actors like Bing Crosby that loved to golf, it may have been the reason the first of those old movies was filmed here.  Golfing in Arizona goes back a very long ways.

Tucson has it's very own Hollywood back lot on the outskirts of town. The location is called Old Tucson Studios.  Old Tucson is a tourist attraction most of the time these days.  But when the occasional western is filmed here, the studios can be back up and running.    Big stars have been filming here since the 1945's when The Bells of St. Mary's was made here in Tucson.  It must have caused quite a stir when Bing Crosby and Ingrid Bergman came to town.  We do have the beautiful San Xavier Mission as well as the St. Augustine Catholic Cathedral so I suppose Tucson was a natural.  And the fact that the historic El Rio Golf Course was here back then may have lured Bing to Tucson.

Since that time, 64 top ten movies have been filmed here in the area.  Those movies include Around the World in Eighty Day, Tombstone, Easy Rider, Giant (James Dean) and Revenge of the Nerds (sorry I could not resist).  And, for those of us that like to golf, we have our very own little piece of the Tucson movie history in a movie called Tin Cup.

A few of the scenes from Tin Cup were filmed at the Tubac Golf Resort about 40 minutes south of Tucson.   The now famous lake in the movie was created by the production company doing the filming and still stands a reminder of the day Kevin Costner, Rene Russo, Cheech Moran and Don Johnson came to town.  The lake guards the 5th hole (I think) and a plaque in the ground next to the lake reminds players of that famous scene from the movie.  This is a beautiful course.  We played it several years ago with our son.  We thought it was worth playing just for the bragging rights.  I would play this course everyday if I could!

I suppose if you have seen Tin Cup, you also remember the scene shot inside the bar of the golf course.  The room is in the cafe attached to Santa Rita Golf Course.  This course is located just south of Tucson in a small subdivision called Corona del Tucson.  I have played this course many times.  It is narrow with houses on almost every fairway and the wind blows out there at the drop of a hat.  But if you like to pretend you are dancing golfing with the stars, you might add it to your list.

Just outside Nogales, AZ a movie star famous during the 1940-50 named Steward Granger and his wife Jean Simmons owned a ranch called Yerba Buena Ranch.  The story goes he kept the ranch so his famous friends could visit.  While the place does not host guests any more, the guest room are still on the property near the Kino Spring Golf Course parking lot.  

In 1691 explorer Father Eusebio Kino found sanctuary at Kino Springs on one of his many expeditions throughout Sonora and Arizona. A half a century ago, Stewart Granger and Jean Simmons owned the 5,280-acre Yerba Buena Ranch and had frequent guests such as John Wayne and Elizabeth Taylor. (Kino Spring Golf Course information)
The property is located very near the Mexican border.  The golf course that occupies the ranch now was built in 1970s.  There are 18 holes, 9 holes out and 9 holes back in.  There is no return to the clubhouse at the turn.  This too is a narrow course with fairways hemmed in by hills and arroyos.  The setting is spectacular and the aura of the old west lingers in the air.

So there you have the perfect vacation agenda...a wonderful way to satisfy your need to see where famous movie stars hung out and golfed!  Life is good.

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Jan 29, 2011

Arizona and Golf...Robert Trent Jones Course in Rio Rico

Rio Rico's Robert Trent Jones Golf Course just north of Nogales, AZ


The weather's fine and 
the company is wonderful!
Arizona and Golf
The perfect combination!

My life includes three close friends that are willing to golf with me!
My husband and I joined 6 friends for a game of golf yesterday.  We drove south of Tucson to a small community/resort called Rio Rico.  The golf course is located very near Nogales, AZ and is connected to a five star hotel called Esplendor Resort.  The golf course was designed by Rober Trent Jones.

We were celebrating a friend's 77 birthday.  The weather was more beautiful that I can describe. The sun was very warm and the air was springtime cool.  We made one tee time on EZ Links and another through the golf course.  We just divided the cost equally among the 4 couples.  Golf in Arizona is a unique experience.   You would have had so much fun!

Hollis is celebrating his 77th Birthday at Wisdoms!
Wisdom's Restaurant located just south of Tubac was the next stop.  Even the hour wait outside under the heaters turned out to be lots of fun.  We ordered chips and salsa and the famous Wisdom margaritas. Once we moved inside where it was warm we were seated by the fire.   I had the best shrimp taco I have ever eaten (just in case you were wondering) and then we shared a cherry deep fried chimichanga with a scoop of ice cream!  

I am a very happy camper.  Hope you're having a wonderful weekend too!


My Friend Carole and her husband Ken

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Jan 27, 2011

The "Other Education" for Seniors....how to live!

I think I am a textbook case for the two educations we need.  I am 69 years old.  I received a degree in education when I was 20, finishing the degree in three years.  I taught in the classroom for 3 years while my husband finished his college education and then I "retired" to raise three children and worked part time as a substitute teacher.  At the age of 50 I returned to the classroom full time.  It was required that I be "re-certified" in the state of Oregon so I returned to college to fulfill that requirement.  Then I "retired" again, this time permanently. A quote on twitter by John Adams described my life perfectly.  After retirement I needed to learn how to live a happy complete life of my own making.  It said:  
"There are two educations. One should teach us how to make a living and the other how to live."
The other education requires that we live in our own skin without the validation that comes from a job and we need to find that validation on our own.  We cannot assume that our children will fill that void left by a life without a job.  We have to find a way to become complete without job titles.  Each person does that in their own way.  The task is different for men and women in many cases.  Each knew their roles before retirement.  Then the adjustment of living in a space that may have been reserved for the other can be very hard.  In my case we suffered the angst of sharing the kitchen...in fact the responsibilities for the entire "house".  Before we retired, we each had our roles and did not have the time or energy to watch how the other person did their job.  We are two very strong personalities so we had opinions when we began to watch each other...those opinions were not always welcome by the person that had been doing that job for many years.

So, if you are just starting with the "other education" let me reassure you that it is not unlike the first, the one you worked for so you could make a living.  It takes time and lots of practice.  But in the end you can live a very long time just being who you are!  AND if you choose, you will be very happy!

Have a wonderful day.


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Jan 25, 2011

CAN GRANDPA COME OUT AND PLAY? Staying in contact with young people.

When my eyes do not focus and I find myself staring at the computer for longer that I care to admit, I know I need to be drawn back into the human pool...you know that one with all age groups and no computer screens.  Writing a blog with "retire" in the title even has google putting me into a niche. Thankfully I remember that there is a whole world out there waiting for me to explore.  Isn't that wonderful? 

I started cleaning my park model like a demon the other day. I think I may be getting ready for company and I may be having a party soon.  Cleaning is always a good sign. 

We are signing up to go on a wagon ride next week at a ranch near the base of the Rincon Mountains here in southern Arizona and I am going to eat steak!  Yup, this almost vegetarian health nut is signing up for the steak feast.  I am very excited. 

We are golfing on Wednesday and Friday.  We are even going out of town to play on Friday to one of my favorite golf courses.  The golf course called Rio Rico is very near the Mexican border so it is a ways down there.  After the round of golf, we will eat at a restaurant called Wisdoms.  We are celebrating a friends 77th birthday.  It will be lots of fun!

Let the games begin!

I know a grandpa that has never grown up.  Kids on the block stop by to ask if he can come out and play.  He will play catch or hit the ball around.  He is one of those grandpas that fill a need in a day and time when dads and moms are very busy.  That is what I want to do...I want us all to go out and play.

But I don't throw the ball around...what I like to do is find where the young people are and go find out what they are thinking and doing. I can always find young people at the local mall.  After a quick stop at the play court to watch small children play I head over to Forever 21. I walk down the aisles and pretend to shop for my daughter and granddaughter. Young people are in the store along with their moms or friends.  It is a very happy place to be. I get to find out what the fashions trends are going to be. I know that a toned down version of everything in that store will be what everyone, young and old, will be wearing in a few years.  A day like this is like a play date at the park for me. 

Now we all know that I will be back writing...that is what I do.  So even though I may be back staring at the screen I make a conscious effort to get out of the niche google has me tucked in.  I like to find places on the web that younger people post.  Mommy blogs and Etsy store websites draws very creative young people.   One of my favorite websites, Studio Thirty Plus, is designed for people over 30 years of age...and boy do I qualify at the rate of 30+30+9!  

When I joined the owners of the blog came to me via email and asked what I was doing.  They were reassured when I answered that I was a retired educator that was always interested in what young people were thinking.  After all, all the posts I write about being a grandparent or a mother-in-law are directly connected to people in this age group. I thought they may be as interested in me and I am in them.

This morning I noticed that this website is all grown up now.  Their membership is skyrocketing and their forum has some wonderful pertinent topics.  I wish them all the success in the world.  The screen shot from above is from one of their members twitter site.  I loved the art she used and have connected with her in order to follow along on her journey.  Her blog is called Are You Serious?

I hope you get the message...leave you safe little hole and go listen to what young people are saying and doing.  I think you will be surprised at what nice people they are.  At least that is what I have found.  Good luck...and have lots of fun!

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Jan 24, 2011

Golfing Without a Membership....Ventana Canyon Resort Mountain Course

The Santa Catalina Mountains are located north...Image via WikipediaTHE COMMUNITY OF GOLFERS
If you are active in any...sport, golf, tennis or croquet...and you mind your sports p's and q's, you will eventually get to know someone that enjoys your company.  You take care of them and they take care of you.  That is the way it works.  You will connect with a group of people that share your tastes and as a result of this bond you will be given opportunities that you would not normally enjoy.  That is what my husband and I have found to be true. This last week is a perfect example.
PLAY WITHOUT JOINING  I live in an RV resort but believe it or not I was given the opportunity to play the spectacular Mountain Course at the Lowe's Ventana Canyon Lodge this last week.  This is the course a guest would use and one of two on the Lowe's property.  Two of my friends and I were invited to play with one of the employees of the resort that lives close to us.  We golfed in the afternoon hours when things are a little more quiet.  
This course with it's uphill and downhill lies coupled with greens, all be it perfect, that slope so subtly, is a challenge for the best of golfers. It is rated 139 from the gold (white) tee.    Yet it is forgiving enough for a golfer like me that plays from the forward tees. I had one of my best scores this season! 
Lowes Ventana Canyon has one of the premier locations here in southern Arizona. Because it is set on the up slope of the Santa Catalina Mountains,  the view takes your breath away. The desert views here are filled with a smokey purple and blue and our sunsets rival anything you will see around the world.  The lodge is reserved for guest only and a relatively small lobby giving it that intimate feel those that can afford this location want.  We drove through the gate with the blessing of the guards after we explained we were playing golf.  A week before we had been denied this privilege when we wanted to buy a gift certificate for a friend.  Evidently this is hollowed ground!  I might note there is also a hotel located on the same property and the ground at that location are open to the public.
PLAYING IN A TOURNAMENT  Golf friends that are competitors like to play in tournaments.  If you mind your p's and q's you may get invited to a member/member tournament.  There are also opportunities to participate in golf charity events throughout the year.  Courses like Arizona National frequently have hosted this type of tournament in the past.  
In an article written for the Sports Network, a golfer named Debra Miller talked about playing golf without buying a golf membership at the high priced courses throughout the country.  The name of the article was Playing Golf Without a Membership.  Liberty Mutual is only one company that sponsors a tournament for charity.  Ms. Miller pointed out the networking possibilities for business people.  Her statement reflects what happens to us as retired people.  She said:
The opportunity to play a TPC course with your friends also makes for great bragging rights and the networking opportunities can be endless. After all, we know how key building relationships can be, especially in the sports industry. The best part is that it’s all part of a good cause.
BUILDING THE NETWORK  As we continue to "network" with our golfing friends we find ourselves invited to play at more and more courses.  We frequently play on the Davis Monthan Airforce Base and have played on the Desert Hills Course in  Green Valley.  Without friends we would never play either one of these courses.  I am loving the golf experience more and more all the time.

I hope you have an absolutely wonderful week.  We will visit again soon!


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Jan 23, 2011


Picture from A Gift Wrapped Life
A Gift Wrapped Life:
A small gift as a way of thanking the host and hostess for a wonderful evening never goes out of style.   A very inexpensive gift wrapped like it is worth a million can be a real show stopper.  This blogger has some beautiful ideas.
Beauty Tips from Katiem2 (Hub Pages)
The lady writes on Hubpages but also has other websites for your use.  She has some of the best beauty tips that cost absolutely nothing.  Check her information before you shampoo, color or highlight your hair!  WOW!
Frugal Traveler
Travel is becoming more of a hot trend...boomers are turning 65 as of last December.  This blogger writes for the NYT.  I follow his information closely. Recently he posted about traveling up and down the east coast of the USA by train/bus...inexpensively.  I think you will like his information.
Thrifty Fun  
This is a wonderful forum website that allows readers to share tip and information. I was looking for a home shampoo for my living room carpet.  This is what I found:
RE: Homemade Carpet Shampoo:  Test an area in the corner first. Pre-treat any "bad" areas with Dawn dish liquid. Mix a solution of 2 gallons warm water; 1 tsp Dawn and 2 TBS baking soda. Run through carpet scrubber; rinse with clean water (through carpet scrubber), let dry. (07/29/2010)
So today will be a football day...we have a HD television set...life is very, very good.

Have a wonderful day.

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Jan 22, 2011

Before and After on Apartment Therapy...which color do you like?

From Apartment Therapy (before)
From Apartment Therapy (after)
Do you get out the camera and take a picture BEFORE the painting begins?  It is such a good idea and I wish I did.  That is what they did on the Apartment Therapy website. In the before picture the wall was painted a gray-blue shade. The designer decided it was time for a change and painted the room salmon pink.

It may be my age or maybe I am slow on the uptake but doesn't the blue look better than the red?  In fact we just painted our bedroom that blue color this last summer. I hate being behind the trend but the red just does not appeal to me.
My Bedroom
This is where a person has to know what they like and what they don't.  Color is a very personal thing and my style is not yours.  It is all good!!!

More Apartment Therapy related posts!

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Jan 20, 2011

!0 Tips from Experienced Grandparents!

Family gather for a picture...Grandma directing.  My children
do not want me to do this anymore!  We now have a professional 
photographer in the family!

My husband and I are grandparents to 11 grandchildren. We have three children. The oldest grandchild is 19 and the youngest will be 1 in February. What we know we have learned the hard way. It has not been perfect but our family still hangs together and our grandchildren are well rounded, healthy and great.  This is a familiar story and one I hear all the time. I would like this list to be much longer so leave a comment.

I am not everything to my grandchildren!  They love me a lot and they know I love them beyond reason. BUT in our family dynamic, we are not the center of their universe.  There are very good reasons for why we have chosen to fulfill the role of occasional backup baby sitter.  In our mind, we want for our children to reach our age and be very proud of the job they have done fulfilling their role as parents.  We do not want to taint the job with too much advice or criticism.  But most of all we know too much, have seen too much and find danger is every move.  So we stand back at a safe distance and try to remain helpful but not intrusive.  Here is how we have done that:
  1. When our first grandchildren were born we resisted the temptation to move very close to them.  It kept us all sane for those first few years.
  2. When we moved closer we found a life of our own.  We golfed and found a circle of friends to play and travel with.  Our children did not find us living in their back pocket.  When they brought our grandchildren to visit us, it was very, very special.  
  3. We tried to keep family gathering simple and encouraged our children to be responsible for their fair share.  Standing back is hard but sometimes we have to let our children fly.  Grandchildren were the reason we gathered but healthy responsible children raise wonderful grandchildren.
  4. Our grandchildren are not our children.  It is none of my business!   Daughter-in-laws do not want my advice.  Go figure.  Learning to keep my own counsel has worked very well for us.  Now, when my daughter-in-laws ASK for my opinion about our grandchildren my very first question is "What do you think?"  Then we talk about the issue from that perspective.
  5. We know that we all have an unconditional love for each other.  Family is a group of people that is given to you.  You do not get to choose them nor do you get to exclude anyone for any reason.  That is a "family law".  Grandchildren benefit from the example we set for them and are loving toward cousins and aunts/uncles.  We are a whole!  When we take family pictures it is difficult to figure out who the children belong to. 
  6. Speaking of examples...grandchildren are watching our every move.  They know when you have picked a favorite.  We do not treat them all alike but we do let each one know how important they are in our lives!  
  7. We have set boundaries although no one knows that we have.  We simply do not have the energy nor the desire to become parents again.  We have told our children very clearly what we can and cannot do.  Taking care of two toddlers?  Sigh...love does not get the job done!  Our children understand.
  8. We leave for several months every year.  We are not rich but we can afford a very small park model in Arizona.  We try to stay away at least 4-5 months.  Yes, I do miss my family but I also have a wonderful life here.  My children are watching us enjoy our retirement and are learning that life is long so we need to find many roles for ourselves.  Parenting and grandparenting is only a part of that life.
  9. We are not perfect.  We apologize when we realize we have gone over the line.
  10. We do not demand "equal time" with the grandchildren.  If there is a grandparent in our family that is the grandchild's favorite we try to rejoice in their love.  I still laugh about my naughty little grandson when he was about 3.  He was in trouble with me so he said "I like my other grandma better."  Out of the mouths of babes!!!
Have a wonderful day Grandma and Grandpa.  I would love to add to this list...what do your do to be a "perfect" grandparent?


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Jan 18, 2011

How to Afford a Winter Season "Home"

What do you think?  Leave a comment! (see more Park Model Information)

Do I want a vacation home in the warm sun? Yes but how can I afford that???

We are always in such a rush to get on with our retirement life that we will make decisions about it long before we have even giving the choices a try. Really, there are a lot of choices. I want to talk today about the choices you will make concerning those cold winter month you endure in the north part of the USA. Should you travel, buy a second home, a prefab park model/trailer or just stay in the north and tough it out? That is what I know about.

Living at the end of the rainbow!
I have known people that saved for that beautiful RV or fifth wheel, bought it as soon as they retired, traveled south to stay in an RV Resort and wonder if they have made the right choice.  An RV or fifth wheel can be very, very expensive.  When they arrive here in our RV resort and see the charming little prefab park models, they realize that they could have a park model home for much less that they paid for their last car...a lot less. When they compare the cost to what they paid for their RV they are shocked.  They would not need to drive a park model through snow drifts to get here every winter.  They would not need to store it in the summer. They would not need to buy gas (yikes!) or maintain a pickup if they are towing a fifth wheel.

Others come for one month to stay in a vacation rental. Maybe they will rent a condo for a lot $$$ or an apartment in a run down complex for less $. Then one day they will be out exploring and discover the RV resorts. After an inquiry they realize that they can live in a very nice place and not be afraid or spend a fortune on a condo rental!
Our Park Model on the End of the Street
I bet that not one new person that has come to our RV Resort has avoided running this through their minds. Our resort is so appealing that almost everyone that stays here is drawn to it's small resort charm and big resort amenities.  Those of us living here would keep it a secret if we could.  We have a great life.

I personally look at our park model like a clunker car.  Old, or new the manufactured home as really very nice. We will ride ours hard and put it away wet for as long as we live.  Then like that old clunker car, we will give it away for almost nothing. I do not see it as an investment anymore that I see a vacation as an investment.  It is just pleasure money down the drain. That is why we saved when we were younger. I don't worry about the rent on the space...it really is cheaper than renting a park model. We are so comfortable and surrounded by our own stuff.

If we were to invest in a new prefab park model we would leave it to our children. Then they could use it hard for many years. Many of the people living here are second generation.

It is a luxury we can afford and that is the best kind!

I live in Rincon Country East RV Resort but there are so many here in Tucson you really should check around.  Voyager Resort used to be a 10-10-10 in Camper Life and even has a small golf course restaurant and motel.  They also have a lot of Park Models.

If you have any questions fell free to leave a comment and I will reply.

Be well.

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Jan 15, 2011

How Smart Phones Can Save You Money!

When my husband passed out in our kitchen several years ago, I realized that we were not going to live forever.  That was when I decided that getting the best in what I can afford now is a wise decision.   Tomorrow may never come!  

Graph from Business Insider
Smart phones and what they can do for us is all the big buzz these days.  In fact, when I checked on what was viral online today, a headline comparing the Android to the iphone caught my interest. The Android has set the smart phone market on it's ear and has proved to be a big competitor for the always popular Blackberry. Texting, online work for the office bees and staying connected is what technology is all about today.  Grandparents are right there in the mix with everyone else.  And the iphone still stays on top in the market.

As a senior citizen I am alway thinking about what these trends have to do with my life.  Am I missing something important?  What will be the trends in the future so I don't waste my money now?  I think about the old kindle I was given when I was about to buy one for myself.  The money would have been a waste...at least I think so now. When the ipads came out with the kindle app included I saw that the $199 that the Kindle cost at the time could have been used put toward my next new computer.  Could it be that keeping track of trends is money in the bank?

That was why I was very interesting in the information from Business Insider regarding the buying trends for the smart phones.  It seems that iphones have not been hurt very much by the Android smart phone. Blackberry, on the other hand, has taken a big hit. The fact that the Android is not weakening the iphone market means that Apple will continue to be a driving innovative force in smart phone technology. This information changes my view of the Andriod completely.  See, I love the simplicity of an Apple devices and iphone is my smart phone of choice. When I put this in the mix with what may happen as a result of a new Verizon-iphone connection, I know I will stay with an iphone (even if I go back to Verizon). Why would I change when trends are showing that it is not a smart(phone) thing to do? (For those of you that are devoted PC users this does not apply to you. I hope your world is as good as mine.)

Keeping our technology simple is money in the bank too. When the Boomer Grandparent over at a website by the same name, wrote that she had too many device cords and not enough underwear, I felt a real kinship with her. Cords for phones, computer, ipods, the GPS, camera battery chargers and a Kindle is just way to much. In fact, it is a reminder for us that we probably have too much money invested in all those devices.

We have found that our iphone can serve as our phone, our ipod, our camera and our GPS. We don't even have a land line for a home phone. I can search for restaurants (Around Me app) and find the nearest grocery no matter where I am. This one device can actually replace my computer if I want to leave work behind.  I have eliminated several cords with just this one device.

The ipad (when I buy it) will eliminate my kindle and even my big computer.  I will buy a keyboard dock, use zip drives and online services to store large files of information.  Photos and word processing files will not be stored in my computer anymore.  Music will be stored on my iphone or I will use the the radio online.  Cords and big boxes to move my computer back and forth to Oregon will be eliminated.  

(I was surprised at the difference in cost 
for the ipad on Amazon...check it out)
I love a day of learning and research.  I thought this was all very interesting stuff.  Keeping it simple and keeping ahead of the trends can actually save us money in the long run.  I like that a lot.

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Jan 14, 2011

What puzzles you? Partially 100% Emissions Free Cars???

2009 Subaru Legacy photographed at the 2009 Mo...

My Car is partially 100% emission free! Please explain that to me...please! Somethings just do not compute! When I noticed this piece of chrome on the back of my Subaru I was reminded of the prefect oxymoron...limited nuclear war...either is it 100% or it isn't. I was puzzled.

Low slung jeans puzzle me. Do women realize their butt is hanging out and think it is attractive? Really, it is not attractive on a plumber and it certainly does not look good on women. Doesn't their backside get cold? I still can't figure out where this style came from and why it has hung around for so long. (No pun intended.)

I am puzzled at how invested we women are in other women's hair color. We will take personal offense at another woman's bad choice in hair color even though we really don't know the other woman. I suppose it is a little like the low slung jeans...we are afraid if we see it often enough we might slip and want purple hair ourselves. We certainly learned how to adjust to hip huggers because our clothes wore out and there was no other choice. Hence the very long blouses!

We have a little house at the entrance to our RV Resort. A man sits inside and opens the gate when we return from the movies at night. The gate opens automatically when we leave. A couple of years ago gate keeper was fired when he did not check the people leaving. That puzzled me...I wondered if we were not free to leave when we wanted. The idea that we may not get back in is worrisome enough.

We have special areas in our resort for people to live that have dogs. You cannot even walk your dog around the park...it is a rule and old people will tell on you. I have had people tell on me for other things so I know. But if you have a bicycle and put your dog in the basket, most people ignore you. A dog being given a ride has always puzzled me. Dogs need to walk...I think! Hospitals are encouraging people to bring animals into wards with old people as a way to wake their minds but we cannot walk a dog in our senior citizen park. It is very puzzling. I think petting other peoples dogs is fun...I don't have to feed or clean up after them but I get to enjoy their company for a few minutes.

Tourist puzzle me...they come to the south with only their shorts and tank tops in the winter. It is cold here because...well it is winter! In the northwestern United States the residents get their shorts out when the temperature rises above 50 degree. Am I the only one that thinks we should cover our skin up when it is cold? That puzzles me...a lot.

I find some things very frightening. Crime, close calls in my car and loud noises in the night cause me to be afraid. Now tell me why anyone would go to a movie and be scared out of their wits ON PURPOSE! I have never figured that one out.

Other things puzzle me...bland food, geezer hats, poor losers, bocce ball, pickle ball, crankiness. But I will spare you the details of those today. What puzzles you?


Jan 13, 2011

How to be a friend to your aging parents! Some common sense!

Now let's get this straight...your parents are not your children.  Old people are not children.  It really is demeaning when you treat an older person like a child.  Even a very ill old person deserves to be treated like an adult!  Because I am getting older all the time, I think I have a few words of advice for you. You can take it or leave it...that is your choice.
If they weren't my family, they would be my friends!

I was eating breakfast at a local restaurant this morning.   My husband and I had just been seated when an older woman using a walker came in accompanied by her daughter.  Now this senario can go either way. The woman using the walker can walk just fine with her walker and the daughter can walk beside her or even behind her carrying on a normal conversation or the daughter can hover over the mother speaking in condescending and superior tones. I think you know what I mean.

Now the mother begins to talk.  She has things on her mind...apartment things, news things, nursing home/assisted living things.  She begins to talk about the woman that sits at her table at lunch every day. The woman is not nice she says....what should the daughter do?
  • Shush the mother telling her that she should just ignore the other woman.
  • Validate her concerns but not make any suggestions.
  • Give advice on how to handle the problem.
Now remember, you are not the parent...you are a friend.  If you think of your parents as adults, you know that they do not want you to tell them how to behave nor do they want your advice!  I have been the daughter in this situation and really I was beating my gums giving advice all over the place.  As I look back on this I know I was wrong on so many levels.  I realize now that all my mother wanted was for me to understand.  I want you to know that your parents want your support for the decisions they make.  If they need your help with intervention where they live you need to do that.  But ask first.  Some things cannot be changed so don't leap into the void.  Let her call the shots!

As you are leaving the restaurant your mother remembers that she wants to go shopping for a red sweater at her favorite shop north of town.  You had not planned on spending that much time with her today.  What do you say?

  • I just don't have time for that right now.
  • We will think about that later.
  • I've been wanting to get some things there...what day can we go?  
  • We will have a field trip later Mom.
You are not the parent...you are a friend!  Let her call the shots!

Even if your parent is suffering from dementia or has reached that time in their life where they have transcended the everyday wants and prefer to reflect on the past, please treat them with the respect they deserve.  Sometimes all you need to be is a good listener and conversationalist.  Who knows, you may learn more than you ever expected.

A real friend enjoys my company.  A real friend treats me like an equal.  A real friend goes places with me unexpectedly.  A real friend loves me in spite of my faults and failings.  A real friend makes me feel important and needed!  A real friend lets me be in charge...they let me call the shots!

Older people do not want to be called sweetey or honey nor do they want to be called "youngsters on a date" like it is a joke.  Really, when someone says that to us we want to laugh...they have no idea how much we enjoy each others company and no joke, we do go on dates.  I know...it sounds nuts but older people are not old inside. Please treat us like an equal and show a little respect for our age...we do like to be treated as though we are wise.  And we like to call the shots! Try that.

My husband and I are a little outrageous sometimes...we say things we shouldn't just to see if we can get a rise out of our children.  We get in trouble...but we are not intimidated by their scolding.  Remember if we are to be treated as though we are wise and strong, we really do need to act the part. We are still teaching our children how to behave even as we grow older!

Finally, be sure that, when you ask for advice or help, it is for the right reason.  Older people will act helpless when they are hungry for attention.  Going to the well for help can actually invite a perception that you are helpless and even childish.  You are a grown up senior citizen.  I am sure that you can find a better way to get time with your children.  In the end we must have a life of our own...our children are not our children anymore...that is why we need to foster our friendship with them.  After all we love them more that heaven can tell.

Have a wonderful day!

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Jan 11, 2011

Why go to YouTube? Boomer Fun!

Logo YouTubeImage via Wikipedia

You Tube has everything!  Really, if your are a senior citizen like me and want instruction or inspiration, go to YouTube.  I was over at Fab Over Fifty this morning and this video caught my eye.  Yoga at 92???  Here is motivation for you!!!

Need a new toy to keep your mind and hands busy?  Here is one I would love to have!

Want to assemble your own computer?  Here is a man that claims he can show you how.

If you are nuts enough to need some more football today, here you go!!
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Jan 10, 2011

Fashion on the Football Field...University or Oregon Uniforms

Oregon's jerseys went through a major remake i...Image via Wikipedia
Okay here's the deal...I am from Oregon!!  I have know quarterbacks for the Oregon football team, stood on the field after a games and shook hands with Rich Brooks, former football coach for Oregon.  I love my state so it only stands to reason that I do worry about what "outfit" our team will wear for the National Championship tonight. :) They had better look good no matter what!

The Oregon athletic department and Phil Knight of Nike fame are joined at the hip.   He has built training facilities and supported the track program almost to an obscene level.  He loves his Alma mater.   Guess who is turning out all those beautiful uniforms that the Ducks wear...why Nike of course?  It has gotten to be quite the big fashion statement buzz for the sports casters and people that care about that sort of thing.  Oregon has more uniforms than I have shoes...and I have a lot of shoes.

I am a girl that loves fashion and let me tell you sport team colors can have a big affect on how people dress in a state where the team has a loyal following or is in the hunt for a national title.  I can imagine what a run there has been on the beautiful green and yellow the Ducks sport at every game.  Oregon will be decked out in their beautiful colors today...fashionistas get out of the way!

So, if Oregon wins tonight, I will not care about their uniforms.  If the unthinkable should happen, they had better look good filing off the field.

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Jan 9, 2011

Computer Electronics Show and the Senior Citizen

Could it be that our laptops and personal computers are a thing of the past?  I have been using an Apple personal computer since the first model appeared all those many years ago.  I thought the laptop was a giant leap forward but did not see it as a replacement for my personal computer. Now the Wall Street Journal and all those people that know about trends are saying Bye, Bye Laptops and PCs.  Everything I use will be replaced with something entirely different according to them.  This is what they had to say:
As inflection points go, the Consumer Electronics Show that kicked off yesterday couldn't be sending a clearer signal: The era of the personal computer is drawing to a close. For an industry gathering that once showcased each new generation of desktop and laptop, this year's show is buzzing with every imaginable flavor of tablet, smart phone and mobile appliance. Welcome to the age of mobile computing. Wall Street Journal 
When I see something like this, I am always wondering how this will affect me and what I buy in the future.  The implications of the WSJ statement caused me to pause.

I am a senior citizen (69) that lives half of the year in Oregon and the other half in Arizona.  My technology needs are driven by my age, location, avocation (writing) and cost.  I have not jumped on board with the ipad....yet. When the device came out initially last spring, I could not see how it would work for me.  I had enough problems with my iphone keypad that I was a little leery.  I was not aware of the keypad dock at the time.  Now I know a new shift in the way we use technology is at hand.

The WSJ article talked about why we won't be buying laptop and will be going to the ipad type device instead.  According to the author we will be docking our ipads to a keyboard (ipad Keyboard Dock) and using external or Internet storage for data.  By doing that sort of thing, we have ended the fear of a crashed computer, gotten rid of the big tower or even a hard drive in our laptop and taken a load out of our brief cases or backpacks. For the senior citizen the ipad concept will be a real winner.  The kindle application, for example, allows the senior citizen to read with enlarged font  The touch screen is not only easy to use but can reduce the keyboarding necessary to arrive at the online destination.  Even my iphone does this for me!

The new data from Pews Research group says that 59% of the populations now uses their phones for online use. That is up from 25% only one year ago. It is hard for me to think of a time when I did not have access to the internet 24/7.  It has become such a way of life for me.  In fact in this day and age where seniors want to keep in close contact with family, the smart phones can be a link to busy children.  I don't worry about carrying a camera with me anymore.  My iphone camera takes such high quality photos I really don't find it necessary.  I had not thought of my use as particularly trendy but it seems it is.

Apple TV has been around for quite a while now.  I had never really paid much attention to it.  Then our son and his family gave us one for Christmas. We could not wait to get it set up and begin using it.  This device allows us to connect online with my flickr account as well as use Netflix and rent movies.  It replaces payper view TV totally (at least for me) and I think will reduce our cable costs eventually.
In the past in order to use Netflix you would sign up and have the movies sent to your house.  My daughter's family began using Netflix online through their children's Xbox setup.  I don't have an Xbox and don't even want one.  It is nice to have the Apple TV that includes the Netflix application as well as an interface between my computer that will allow me to stream photo slide shows and music through our amp.  At home in Oregon this will give us the full benefit of a surround sound system.  Really, for this senior citizen, it was a perfect gift.

So what are the new and not so new technologies that I love?  Here we go:

  • The Amazon Kindle reader is old and yet so new to me.  I love the world that it has opened for me.  My age makes is a must have.
  • Apple TV...great for the senior citizen that wants to have the advantages of a computer that connects to their TV.  Reducing cost is a good thing!
  • The ipad and some of the peripheral tools that can be added...I don't own this one yet but it is definitely on the list of good stuff!  Location will not be important anymore!  I think I will probably be using it for writing too. 
  • My iphone, its camera's, map/search/gps function, online possibilities, etc.
Technology has become a necessity on our lives. Seniors are going to find it more and more useful as time goes on. The trick is to find the right things that will keep them ahead of the trends. It is worth doing the research now to avoid the mistakes later. Welcome to the age of mobile computing!

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Jan 8, 2011

Grumpy Guys - MORE Magazine

"I keep finding these great articles for you to read. Check this one out!"
Irritable Male Syndrome: What is it and is it real?
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Jan 7, 2011

AARP and Me...I was afraid to admit my age!

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AARP Home Page
I am almost embarrassed to say that I have avoided AARP like the plague...that was not smart folks, not at all. Psychologically I don't think that I wanted to admit that I was old enough to belong to the group.  Those 4 capital letter have brought people to their knees.  Even though I am 69, I really don't think about my age until I look in the mirror.  So, when we begin receiving letters from the AARP organization in our late 40's, we are all reminded that we are not going to be young forever.  An AARP letter can feel like another nail in a our coffin!

Image from AARP
I write a blog about retirement and how we can live a full, rich, beautiful life and simply not think about our age.  I want people to realize that, as AARP says, their old age is not their parents old age.  I have come to the conclusion that AARP, with the help of the boomer generation, can help us come to that place. 

My apologies to all the wonderful people over at AARP...they do wonderful things for the generation of people that are living the second half of their lives.  It is as simple as that.  For example:
Games...I played golf with a woman that is fighting for her mind.  She told me that online games keep her thinking.  They help her feel better about herself.  AARP has several games that you can play and keep score online.  It would be fun for anyone that enjoys a game of chess or solitaire.  (See Learning is Not Just for the Young!)

Jobs....If you are interested in working after retirement or travel with a retired spouse and still want/need to work yourself, they have several job suggestions.  I don't believe I have ever seen this kind of information and assistance anywhere else.  Tell me if I am wrong!
This is only two of the items in a list of several dozen. Everything from help with insurance costs to the words of the Dali Lama can be found on their pages.  I am of the opinion NOW that everyone should pay attention to what they have to say...even our children.  After all they are the people that speak for us in the halls of our government and the public's eye! 

Just a thought!


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