Here is an article written by Barbara Graham on Grandparents.com. She asked the question, "Are boomer grandparents different than their parents? Read the article and the comment I posted below. Do you agree??? Here is the beginning paragraph:
loved my son and my brother's kids — just as her mother loved us — but neither woman seemed as gaga and blotto about their grandchildren as my friends and I are. My mother and my grandmother didn't seem to obsess and worry the way we do, either.
This is a wonderful and thoughtful article. We all have a different approach to family dynamics. I personally am a grandma that thinks that distance is a good thing for children and grandchildren. My husband and I spend half of our year in Oregon near family and the other half in Arizona. It is a good healing time for all of us.
As a result of the choices my husband I have made, our children have grown more independent and are solving their problems without us lurking in the background.
Don't misunderstand me...we love our grandchildren more that we can even believe. We just know what we must do. Our parents gave us the opportunity to grow into strong parents and we want to do the same for our children.
This all ties into our mother-in-law position in the family. This might be more significant than the relationship to our grandchildren. The example we set for our family can be distorted because of a poor relationship with our child's spouse. Related article "10 Ways to be a Good Mother/Father-in-Law"
I published this article 4 years ago but most of it is still relevant. I hope it is helpful.
I love being a snow bird. But I wish someone had told me all the tricks before I began. There probably was a book I forgot to read or maybe that book simply did not exist when I started my snow bird adventure. That is why I am here today. Here is the scoop on insurance, financial matters, utilities precautions and travel.
I am not here to burst your bubble but there are a few reality checks that need to be considered. I know...traveling off to warm weather in the winter, having two sets of friends and maybe a second home, sounds very luxurious. Golfing while your friends are mucking around on snow and ice would be soooooo dreamy. I want you to stop and think about what you might be doing. There are choices to be made and even financial sacrifices. I have been doing this on and off since I was 55. If over 15 years of experience makes me an expert, then that is what I am!
You have always dreame…
Life is a lot different when it is viewed from the rear view mirror. The fact that everything is backwards in real time reveals what we want to believe about the past.
In the review I wrote in my last post, the time frame for the setting was the early 1950s. I would have been 10 or 11 much like the boy that was the main character in Ivan Doig's The Last Bus to Wisdom. In the story Donal was put on a Greyhound bus to travel for several day alone. He was being sent to stay with his aunt while his grandma had surgery. When I think about that now I cannot believe that anyone would have actually done that even in that time. Not anyone that knew who traveled on the Greyhound bus!
Under the blanket that the post WWII generation covered itself with was hidden a much darker time. But putting on a happy face and pretending that nothing bad ever happened was more the norm than not.
Even the veterans that talked to reporters in documentaries hid the damage that was done to their hearts and s…
I live around snowbirds 6 months of the year. I have heard those people say that they all want to live the "snowbird" lifestyle when they go home.
But it just is not possible. They are isolated and cold. Social activities with friends and beautiful weather are greatly missed when they return to the realities of their "real" life.
One couple I visited with lately returned to Florida this morning where they own a home. The woman is a nurse and works in the summer. They are not going home until May this year. It is too cold in Michigan in the spring so they are hoping to extend their good weather season by simply staying away. Besides that they love their Florida lifestyle a lot.
Last week I visited with a woman that lives the snowbird lifestyle year around. No going home to the Midwest in the spring. They essentially vacation 12 month out of the year. And I thought their solution for avoiding unpleasant weather and keeping their lifestyle interesting was genius.